Monday, June 22, 2009

i'm a coward

Colossians 1:21-23

Once you were alienated from God and were enemies in your minds because of your evil behavior. 22But now he has reconciled you by Christ's physical body through death to present you holy in his sight, without blemish and free from accusation— 23if you continue in your faith, established and firm, not moved from the hope held out in the gospel. This is the gospel that you heard and that has been proclaimed to every creature under heaven...
This morning's sermon was one of the most convicting sermons in a long time.

Here's what I got out of it:
I'm tired of playing games. I'm tired of going through the motions. I'm tired of the nothingness of life. There is something more than this. There's GOT to be.

I'm spiritually retarded. And I. Am. Sick. Of. Being. This. Way.

Ask me in one month what I have done with the brokenness of the moment I am experiencing right now, and I'll probably say "nothing".

Because that's the kind of person I am. I'm too much of a freaking coward and too dang lazy to change. Why should I think this time will be different?


Danny Lucas said...

I hear ya Dave.

When I do my garden, I love parsnips. They are like a sweet, white carrot.

I love them with roasts.
I love them sliced thick and fried in butter, with some honey, chopped parsley, and grated orange rind. I get thankful when I eat them.

But in my garden, when I plant parsnips, the seeds go deep. It will be forever before they arise above ground as a top in green, for the real parsnip is growing deep, in darkness and cold.

I plant radishes above my parsnips. Radishes are more proplific than rabbits. They grow in days, and keep coming on.
I do not particulatly like radishes, though occasionally I will slice some thinly as decorative in a be pushed aside.

But when I pull the radishes from the ground, it breaks up the soil ABOVE my favored parsnips below. Without that brokeness, my parsnips would find that they have been underground so long, the soil above is a rock, and they cannot break through.

It is worth the wait for a parsnip and they last well into wintertimes of my life. I simply stake the area in the fall when everything is gone, and push away snow to get them as needed for dinner. The coldest of cold, makes them sweeter and sweeter.

Without the brokeness of a dreaded radish, I would never savor a garden parsnip.

Your verse from the Bible says everything has been done for you by Him.
Rest in faith.

You do not have to do anything. Your value exists as you are; above grown and broken. You do not have to change, and you exhaust yourself with the thought of change.

Simply abide.
HIS job, the growing part. In the end, what you seek will be there in abundance (especially if it is a parsnip!).

Anonymous said...

Preach the Gospel brother. To yourself, your family and people. And always be keeping fruit in repentance, reading your Bible and praying. I know what you're going through because I am too.

God bless you